It’s Not Out There

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The Apostle Paul once said that he had learned to be content whether he found himself in circumstances of plenty or in circumstances of scarcity. The New Testament was originally written in Greek and the word used here was autarkhj; according to Strong’s Exhaustive Concordance it meant, “Sufficient for oneself, strong enough or processing enough to need no aid or support
independent of external circumstances contented with one’s lot, with one’s means, though the slenderest.”
And one of the English definitions for content is blissful happiness or a perpetual state of joy. So, what Paul was saying is that he had learned to be happy–independent of the circumstances around him. He had learned a secret. Happiness, true happiness, is not dictated by anything outside us.

IF IT’S NOT out there then where is it?

You may say, “But if he knew what I had to put up with” or if “if he knew what I was going through” he wouldn’t be so quick to say that. Here’s the thing. Nobody else ever has gone through exactly what you are going through because you are the only you that has faced your unique life with it’s unique attributes. Each of us have our own path to walk. Nobody can walk it for us. One thing I realized when my dad died and I was with him as he came to the time to make his transition into pure spirit was that no matter how much handholding I did, no matter how many times I told him that I loved him, when it was all said and done, he had to make that final step by himself. It was his life and his crossing, not mine. We all begin our temporal journeys as individuals, and we all end them as individuals. Yet, somewhere along the way, we begin to think that happiness lies somewhere outside of ourselves. We start to look for someone or something else to “fix” the things that we don’t like about our lives.

Some people look for fulfillment in the things they can acquire, in fame, in success, in popularity, in money, in appearance, in social media friends, in relationships and likes and shares. Yet, it’s not there and they are left feeling there is something “missing,” something “more.” And there is, but it’s not in the places they’re looking. Like that old song says, they are “looking for love in all the wrong places.”

THE ONLY PLACE true happiness is found is in alignment with the Almighty Source of the Universe. When you line up with the plan meant especially for you, then you find inner peace, fulfillment, purpose; that is happiness. You realize that you can be happy with or without others and that what really makes you happy is doing what brings you peace in your heart. You have to get in touch with who you are inside, your spirit. And your spirit is connected to the Great Spirit, the Almighty Source of life. You discover that you don’t need as much validation and you’re not moved as much by criticism as you once were. Suddenly, you feel you have nothing to prove to anyone, no need to struggle.

WHEN YOU ARE in line with God, you don’t need others to perform or behave a certain way. You get that their journeys are different than yours and that your walk is your walk and you have no need to control them or make them behave the way you want them to. You learn to let God take care of them. You gain peace in your heart that comes from walking your personal God-given path.

If there is a personal struggle involved in the path you are walking, and you constantly feel an internal tug-of-war, there is resistance involved, which means you and God are in disagreement about the way you’re going, about the path you’re choosing. As long as you have internal resistance, you won’t have peace.

“NOBODY GETS ME,” I told myself that for years. I looked for a true friend, a real kindred spirit. Finally, I get it. It’s not anyone else’s job to “get me.” It’s mine. Their job is to get themselves!

Happiness is not “out there” somewhere. Peace is not out there somewhere. It’s not dependent upon the right circumstances. My attitude has the power to change my circumstances. Nothing else does. I don’t need to wait for the perfect conditions to be the person I’m meant to be.

Just before I started writing this blog post, an ad popped up on my FaceBook page with a handsome man’s face, promising to help me find my “special someone.” But guess what? My special someone is the spirit within. No one else can complete me. I’m not half a person. I’m a whole person already.

When you cultivate a relationship with Almighty Source and are spirit-led, you don’t need to be with someone else to feel complete. You are happy with others and you’re happy alone. If you have an attitude of gratitude everyday and refuse to let the fear that the news media and the negativity of drama drag you down, if you wake up each day and say a prayer of thankfulness and allow yourself to find joy in your daydreams whether they are logically possible or not, then I promise you, you will begin to see “good” in your world and things will change. One of my favorite Wayne Dyer quotes is, “If you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change.”

NO ONE CAN ever see life through anyone else’s eyes. If we try to force others to see life through our eyes, we are just wasting our time. We become cynical, judgmental and bitter. However, we live with gratitude, appreciation, joy, and love, then others will see our light and maybe, they will realize they are light, too, and they will begin to shine.

It’s not our job to go around judging another’s perception of life. It’s our job to live ours. It’s not our job to judge. Jesus said that if we judge, we bring judgement on ourselves. Who am I to tell you how to live your life? That’s between you and God. Only YOU know what brings peace and alignment in your life. I’m only responsible to travel my own journey.

I finally understand what unconditional love really is. It doesn’t mean to look at a horrible condition and love the horrible condition, but it means to walk a life that is in line with God’s perfect plan for you. That’s where happiness is found. That’s where peace is at.

Finally, when you decide to listen to the still, small voice within you, to examine your own heart and learn to identify those things that bring you out of alignment with God, out of peace, those things that cause you inner conflict, guilt, confusion and turmoil. When you learn to withdraw from those things if necessary, then you are walking in unconditional love because you aren’t being guided by religious rules, by someone else’s prescription for your life or by the standards of the world’s idea of success but you are truly being spirit-led and that is where happiness is found.

SO STOP TRYING to make things happen, stop the struggle. Make your requests known to God then feel happy and confident that they are as good as done and listen to your inner guidance system which is the peace of God. Let inner peace be your navigator through life. If you’re having to look over your shoulder all the time, if you have knots in your stomach on a daily basis, if you’re constantly sighing and feel a sense of dread, even about things you like, then maybe it’s time to examine what you’re doing that is throwing your inner peace out of whack.

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