Color an Ocean of Peace

“Art Teacher,” Bobby calls out, “Jimmy just hit me and said my picture is ugly.”

“Jimmy, why did you hit Bobby?” I ask.

“Because” Jimmy says, “he’s not coloring the ocean blue. The ocean is supposed to be blue. I told him to color his water blue and he won’t listen.”

“So, you got mad?” I say.

“Yes.”

“And you hit him to make him do what you wanted him to do?”

“No, it wasn’t like that. He’s not doing it RIGHT. The ocean is supposed to be blue.”

“So, Bobby is coloring his picture of his world differently than you think the world is supposed to look?” I say, “And you don’t like the way he sees the world because it doesn’t match the way you see it, so, you got mad at him and tried to make him do it the way you think it needs to be done. You hurt Bobby because you wanted him to make his world your way? Is that what happened?”

“Ugh,” Jimmy says, “Yes, I got mad because he ain’t doing right. And he won’t listen to me when I try to tell him the right way to do it.”

“And how is that hurting you?” the teacher asks.

“But it’s supposed to be blue!” Jimmy is clearly upset that anyone could see the ocean as green, black, and purple instead of blue.

“And how is that hurting you?” I ask again.

“But…oceans are blue.”

“Your ocean is blue,” I say. “Bobby’s ocean is multicolored. What if you color your world and Bobby colors his world and you don’t try to force Bobby’s world to look just like yours? Then you will both have a better day.”

“I want you to make him do it right,” Jimmy says sullenly.

“Do you want to be right or happy?” I ask.

Jimmy and Bobby both look at me, confusion etched across their little faces.

I explain. “I’m not going to force Bobby to color his ocean the way you want it to be. However, if you insist on being right, and hitting Bobby because he made a choice that’s different than yours, then you are going to find yourself in a very unhappy position,  or you can accept that Bobby is different than you and that it’s okay for other people to see the world differently, mind your own business, color your own ocean and have a peaceful, happy day. The choice is yours. So, do you want to be right or be happy?”

Jimmy thinks hard for a moment. Letting go of the need to be right is tough. Then he says, “I’d rather be happy.”

Bobby pipes up, “Me, too. I like to be happy.” He proceeds to draw a purple sun in the sky.

Jimmy visibly cringes, but he chooses to be happy, at least for now. He hasn’t seen Sophia’s spotted, flying unicorn fish yet.

………………………………………………………………………………………

The Secret of Peace

Jimmy’s teacher is trying to let him in on a secret. It’s the secret of peace. If we want peace in our lives, then we must stop trying to control the actions of others.

No wonder Jesus said, “Blessed are the peacemakers for they shall be called the children of God.” That doesn’t mean we go around settling arguments but that we facilitate inner peace. Outer peace without inner peace is impossible.

The secret to having outer peace in the world is more people with inner peace!

As adults, we are not so different than Jimmy, concerned about what someone else is doing. Perhaps, it would be good if we could learn the lesson Jimmy’s teacher is trying to teach him. We don’t need to control others and the only actions we are ultimately responsible for are our own.

Ironically, we can see the tiniest faults in the behaviors of others yet neglect to see similar things in ourselves. Jesus once responded to some critics by saying they had the ability to see a speck of dust in someone else’s eyes but couldn’t see the giant beam sticking out of their own.

If I had a quarter for every time a child has come up to me and reported on the affairs of others in hopes that I would “punish” the other child, I think (maybe playfully) I would be as rich as Elon Musk! It seems to start early, this need to control others, even when those actions have nothing to do with us. Kids will often say things like, “Make them let me play with their toy.” Or, “Make them play with me.” Translation: “Do what I want YOU to do and MAKE THEM behave the way I want them to behave.”

Sadly, this desire to control and punish others often doesn’t end when childhood ends. It just graduates and grows bigger and instead of making someone give up their toy or play with them, the controllers want to dictate how others should live their lives. They want to invade neighboring countries, take over their resources and control their populations.

How much pain and suffering in the world would be alleviated if world leaders didn’t try to make other countries conform to their wishes?  If they didn’t invade and seek control? What if everyone in the world were truly empathic? What if we realized our Connectedness?

Peace on Earth

When Jesus was born, the angels spoke to shepherds proclaiming peace on earth, but of course, the world hasn’t been at “peace” since that time, but in the biblical sense, peace doesn’t mean the absence of war. It means inner tranquility, staying calm regardless of what others are doing or saying. In other words, inner peace is only found when we let go of the need to control others.

Just as Jimmy isn’t justified in dictating how Bobby colors or one child isn’t justified in forcing others to play, we are never justified in wanting to control the feelings and thoughts of others.

It’s far too common and too easy to focus on the negative aspects of others, to talk bad about them and try to make them behave the way we want them to, but it’s a losing battle and in the end, we accomplish nothing but destroying our own peace of mind and happiness. I once heard a very young minister named Randy (who knows? Maybe he is reading this post right now!) say, “You can’t legislate morality.” He was right. Kindness, goodness, empathy, joy, love….those things must come from the inside out and be voluntary. If you force people into, it’s not real and sooner or later the sleeping demons of self-righteousness, greed and power will awaken.

LET IT GO!

Peter, an early follower of Jesus, wrote, “Do not repay injury for or insult with insult. On the contrary, repay injury with kindness, because to this you were invited so that you may obtain adulation. For whoever would take pleasure in, long for, and enjoy life (both physical and spiritual, present and future) and experience good days must restrain his language from injurious and their lips from treacherous (deceitful and harmful) speech. They must cease from doing injury and do good; they must seek peace and pursue it.”

Likewise, Paul, also a student of Jesus once told a group of Thessalonians who were in The Way to aspire to live quiet and peaceful lives, to mind their own business and work with their own hands.

A passage from Psalms keeps going through my head:

46:10 He says, “Be still, and know that I am God;
I will be exalted among the nations,
I will be exalted in the earth.”

The words “be still” there denote a “letting go” or “falling into.” In other words, as Elsa says in Frozen, “Let it Go!” The word “know” means to recognize, get it, or understand.

So, we could put it in the modern vernacular, “Let it go! Relax, and recognize…” What are we recognizing? We are recognizing that I Am God. Which God? The I AM. And what are we recognizing? The fact that I Am is God! And what ever you need I Am is. Nothing is impossible with I Am God. Nothing.

Peace comes when we let go and relax in the knowledge that the Almighty Source of all that is or has been or ever will be is in control. Peace comes when we realize that a person’s life-worth doesn’t consist of our possessions, or what color we paint our oceans.

Stillness and tranquility set things in order in the universe.

Dyer, Wayne W.. Living the Wisdom of the Tao (p. 93). Hay House. Kindle Edition.

 

But the muddiest water clears

                           as it is stilled.

And out of that stillness

life arises.

Dyer, Wayne W.. Living the Wisdom of the Tao (p. 33). Hay House. Kindle Edition.

 

 

It’s Not Out There

Photo by Andrea Piacquadio on Pexels.com

The Apostle Paul once said that he had learned to be content whether he found himself in circumstances of plenty or in circumstances of scarcity. The New Testament was originally written in Greek and the word used here was autarkhj; according to Strong’s Exhaustive Concordance it meant, “Sufficient for oneself, strong enough or processing enough to need no aid or support
independent of external circumstances contented with one’s lot, with one’s means, though the slenderest.”
And one of the English definitions for content is blissful happiness or a perpetual state of joy. So, what Paul was saying is that he had learned to be happy–independent of the circumstances around him. He had learned a secret. Happiness, true happiness, is not dictated by anything outside us.

IF IT’S NOT out there then where is it?

You may say, “But if he knew what I had to put up with” or if “if he knew what I was going through” he wouldn’t be so quick to say that. Here’s the thing. Nobody else ever has gone through exactly what you are going through because you are the only you that has faced your unique life with it’s unique attributes. Each of us have our own path to walk. Nobody can walk it for us. One thing I realized when my dad died and I was with him as he came to the time to make his transition into pure spirit was that no matter how much handholding I did, no matter how many times I told him that I loved him, when it was all said and done, he had to make that final step by himself. It was his life and his crossing, not mine. We all begin our temporal journeys as individuals, and we all end them as individuals. Yet, somewhere along the way, we begin to think that happiness lies somewhere outside of ourselves. We start to look for someone or something else to “fix” the things that we don’t like about our lives.

Some people look for fulfillment in the things they can acquire, in fame, in success, in popularity, in money, in appearance, in social media friends, in relationships and likes and shares. Yet, it’s not there and they are left feeling there is something “missing,” something “more.” And there is, but it’s not in the places they’re looking. Like that old song says, they are “looking for love in all the wrong places.”

THE ONLY PLACE true happiness is found is in alignment with the Almighty Source of the Universe. When you line up with the plan meant especially for you, then you find inner peace, fulfillment, purpose; that is happiness. You realize that you can be happy with or without others and that what really makes you happy is doing what brings you peace in your heart. You have to get in touch with who you are inside, your spirit. And your spirit is connected to the Great Spirit, the Almighty Source of life. You discover that you don’t need as much validation and you’re not moved as much by criticism as you once were. Suddenly, you feel you have nothing to prove to anyone, no need to struggle.

WHEN YOU ARE in line with God, you don’t need others to perform or behave a certain way. You get that their journeys are different than yours and that your walk is your walk and you have no need to control them or make them behave the way you want them to. You learn to let God take care of them. You gain peace in your heart that comes from walking your personal God-given path.

If there is a personal struggle involved in the path you are walking, and you constantly feel an internal tug-of-war, there is resistance involved, which means you and God are in disagreement about the way you’re going, about the path you’re choosing. As long as you have internal resistance, you won’t have peace.

“NOBODY GETS ME,” I told myself that for years. I looked for a true friend, a real kindred spirit. Finally, I get it. It’s not anyone else’s job to “get me.” It’s mine. Their job is to get themselves!

Happiness is not “out there” somewhere. Peace is not out there somewhere. It’s not dependent upon the right circumstances. My attitude has the power to change my circumstances. Nothing else does. I don’t need to wait for the perfect conditions to be the person I’m meant to be.

Just before I started writing this blog post, an ad popped up on my FaceBook page with a handsome man’s face, promising to help me find my “special someone.” But guess what? My special someone is the spirit within. No one else can complete me. I’m not half a person. I’m a whole person already.

When you cultivate a relationship with Almighty Source and are spirit-led, you don’t need to be with someone else to feel complete. You are happy with others and you’re happy alone. If you have an attitude of gratitude everyday and refuse to let the fear that the news media and the negativity of drama drag you down, if you wake up each day and say a prayer of thankfulness and allow yourself to find joy in your daydreams whether they are logically possible or not, then I promise you, you will begin to see “good” in your world and things will change. One of my favorite Wayne Dyer quotes is, “If you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change.”

NO ONE CAN ever see life through anyone else’s eyes. If we try to force others to see life through our eyes, we are just wasting our time. We become cynical, judgmental and bitter. However, we live with gratitude, appreciation, joy, and love, then others will see our light and maybe, they will realize they are light, too, and they will begin to shine.

It’s not our job to go around judging another’s perception of life. It’s our job to live ours. It’s not our job to judge. Jesus said that if we judge, we bring judgement on ourselves. Who am I to tell you how to live your life? That’s between you and God. Only YOU know what brings peace and alignment in your life. I’m only responsible to travel my own journey.

I finally understand what unconditional love really is. It doesn’t mean to look at a horrible condition and love the horrible condition, but it means to walk a life that is in line with God’s perfect plan for you. That’s where happiness is found. That’s where peace is at.

Finally, when you decide to listen to the still, small voice within you, to examine your own heart and learn to identify those things that bring you out of alignment with God, out of peace, those things that cause you inner conflict, guilt, confusion and turmoil. When you learn to withdraw from those things if necessary, then you are walking in unconditional love because you aren’t being guided by religious rules, by someone else’s prescription for your life or by the standards of the world’s idea of success but you are truly being spirit-led and that is where happiness is found.

SO STOP TRYING to make things happen, stop the struggle. Make your requests known to God then feel happy and confident that they are as good as done and listen to your inner guidance system which is the peace of God. Let inner peace be your navigator through life. If you’re having to look over your shoulder all the time, if you have knots in your stomach on a daily basis, if you’re constantly sighing and feel a sense of dread, even about things you like, then maybe it’s time to examine what you’re doing that is throwing your inner peace out of whack.

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